Mentally Lost~ (berry)

Zero sighs "I'll leave when jax is feeling better since that's what you want.."

"Do you think that cross will ever let him go?" White asked.

Zero looks at her "mine let go.. He just has to come with terms with what he remembers.. That's all he has to do.."

White sighed. "It feels like it's taking forever..."

Zero looks at her "I'll tell him.."

Jax slowly started to wake up in his bedroom.

Lucas smiles "are you feeling ok jax?"

"My head feels a bit fuzzy.." Jax sighed rubbing his forehead.

Lucas smiles "well would you like to have some tea?" He holds up a cup.

Jax nods slowly and takes a slow sip from the cup.

Lucas smiles happily "I'm glad your awake.."

Jax shrugged. "Till I start turning evil again, right?" He sighed.

Lucas blinks and looks at him.

Zero walks in and looks at him "no you won't.. Just come to turns with your memories and you'll be fine.."

"I don't know how to control it anymore..." Jax sighed. "Everytime soemthing reminds me of my past my memories disappear again. I don't know what to do..." Jax laid back down on the bed.

Zero looks at him "that's why when you remember something you accept it.. Don't fight it.."

"I don't want the bad memories.." Jax softly growled. "I don't want to accept it."

Zero looks at him "but you have to take the bad with the good jax you have people who care about you.. Don't let their hope be for nothing.. We're all here for you.."

Lucas smiles "please jax.."

"I can't take the torment anymore!" Jax yelled jumping off the bed. "I'd rather forget absolutely everything I don't even care if I forget myself!"

Zero grabs his head "stop it you need to calm down!"

Lucas looks at the ground with tears in his eyes "fine forget everything I don't care anymore! I wanted to help you so bad but if that's how you feel!" He runs out the house.

Zero blinks "Lucas wait!" He sighs and sits down "shit.."

"I don't think you get what I went through!" He roared after Lucas.
Jax then turned to Zero and glared. "You don't know either! The abuse, the never ending torment, someone who I thought was my father raping me, torturing me, cutting me into pieces. Year after year for thousands of years! Never having anyone there to comfort me. Forgetting how to even speak english because there was just no one there to speak too! Just me and my mind! My insanity!"
Jax started laughing. "YOU THINK I CAN STILL BE SANE?"
The cross started to glow and Jax started to lose himself again.

Zero lifts up his shirt and turns around a cross was carved into his back and his chest was covered in scars. "you really don't think I know what you've been through... I couldn't have a relationship with anyone I killed who ever I seen.. Your mother was lucky.. You can't say people don't know what you want through! All fallen angels have unpretty pasts your not the only one.. I still loose myself I'm not perfect you never will be either but at least I accept my past.." He puts his shirt on "your friend wanted to help you just like your mother helped me.. Your not sure what he went through in his past it could be similar to yours but your vision is clouded by self pity.."

Jax laughed. He sounded like a psycho. "You think I am self pitying?" He continued to laugh.
"No I am hungry father, very hungry. Hungry for blood. I want to kill Wes. I want to kill Vain. I want to kill every demon who ever hurt me and even all the demons that existed. I am not like you I will not kill angels! No I will rid this earth of vile demons even if I am alone in this and then I will take over!" Jax disappeared out of thin air reappearing back in his lonely realm.

Zero sighs and shakes his head. He takes out and energy ball and it appears beside jax "if that is what you choose I guess you'll be killing Lucas first he's a demon kinda.."

Jax growled and destroyed the ball that appeared beside him. He appeared in the woods. He took the cross that now held all his memory and emotions once again and threw it out in the middle of the woods so no one couls find it unless they searched the whole forest floor.

Lucas blinks and looks up to see jax. He sighs and looks down "have fun jax.. I hope you find something that makes you happy.."